Dr. Jordan

Gratifying Childhood Losses in Adulthood vs Grieving and Acceptance

By Dr. Jordan / September 2, 2026 /

Early psychoanalytic theorists like Balint and Winnocott, viewed problems with early parental bonding as the origin of emotional difficulties in adulthood. If the love you were supposed to get without complications does not arrive for reasons in the parent, all kinds of problems can ensue. This part of their theorizing makes intuitive sense. It was…

Psychological Love Life Defenses: 6. Misrepresentation

By Dr. Jordan / August 20, 2026 /

This is the last post in the series of posts analyzing common love life defenses that interfere with and complicate a peson’s ability to give and receive love. In this post we will talk about misrepresentation, defined as the act of misrepresenting oneself in a love life situation in order to manipulate its outcome.  A…

Psychological Love Life Defenses: 5. Changing the Person You Love

By Dr. Jordan / August 18, 2026 /

The last two psychological love life defenses I will analyze in this series of posts are, changing your partner and misrepresentation. These two are a bit more creative than the other love life defenses I’ve discussed so far. But not necessarily in a way that helps preserve and develop the feeling of love. There are…

Psychological Love Life Defenses: 4. Avoiding Love Altogether

By Dr. Jordan / August 16, 2026 /

Avoiding love relationships is the ultimate love life defense because the individual is out of the game, so to speak. The most effective way to manage the disappointment and hurt that is possible in a love life is to avoid love relationships altogether. For many individuals, this is the conscious or unconscious plan as a…

Psychological Love Life Defenses: 3. Habitual Conflict

By Dr. Jordan / August 15, 2026 /

Some psychological love life defenses are used to make a love relationship “tolerable.” This is the case with what I am calling habitual conflict. The usual unconscious motivation is to be able to be in a love relationship protected from hurt. As in all the psychological defenses I am describing in this series of posts, past…

Psychological Love Life Defenses: 2. Keeping Your Emotional Distance in a Love Relationship

By Dr. Jordan / August 14, 2026 /

One of the easiest ways to be in a love relationship when you have unresolved emotional intimacy issues, is to keep a certain distance from the person you are in love with.  Here in this article, the primary focus is on  “emotional distance.” Although physical distancing, for some people, may be involved as well. There…

Psychological Love Life Defenses: 1. Denying You Have a Love Life Problem

By Dr. Jordan / August 6, 2026 /

Ever since I began studying the unhealthy love life from an interpersonal psychoanalytic perspective, I’ve noticed quite a few people cope with and/or prevent the hurt that often accompanies a love life with an array of psychological defenses. Problem here is that these defenses interfere with the ability to give and receive love. They harden…

Porn and Emotional Intimacy in Men’s Love Lives

By Dr. Jordan / May 31, 2026 /

Pornography is a common form of physical sexual release in our digital age. The internet has made it so. As a consequence, a person in need of sexual release can get easily addicted to pornography by masturbating in response to sexual images. Which by the way are presently being created by AI in such a…

Teaching Audiences How To Work On Their Love Lives

By Dr. Jordan / May 21, 2026 /

“There is nothing better than a room full of people interested in love!” This is my opening line whenever I’m face to face with an audience of people interested in my presentation – “Disappointing Love Life and how to fix it.” The prospect of teaching a group of people how we learn to love and…

Repairing Your Disappointing Love Life

By Dr. Jordan / May 2, 2026 /

I created a highly effective psychological method of improving a disappointing love life. I call it the Love Life Consultation. A telehealth consultation that focuses exclusively on identifying and changing what was unconsciously learned about love relationships that is unhealthy. Telehealth is ideally suited for working on a love life given its convenience, reduced social…