Dr. Jordan

Love-Life Tip: Don’t Try To Fix Your Lover

By Dr. Jordan / April 13, 2012 /

If you’re in the business of trying to ‘fix’ your lover, you need to read this post. That goes for those of you who are in the process of being ‘fixed’ as well. Fixing implies that something is ‘broken’ and needs fixing. In a love relationship, the implication is that your lover is ‘broken’ or…

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Commitment Phobia?

By Dr. Jordan / April 13, 2012 /

If you are avoiding a love commitment chances are you’re afraid of being ‘locked up’ in your love relationship. This fear of being controlled requires an underlying belief that you will lose your freedom if you committed to love. Let’s examine this fear of losing your freedom in love a little more deeply. Many of…

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Love-Life Tip: Express Hurt Not Anger

By Dr. Jordan / April 10, 2012 /

In your love-life you can’t work with anger or its extreme form rage. Anger is often a defense against the hurt, fear, or vulnerability you can feel in a love relationship. When angry you are not open to reflecting on yourself or working on a relationship. You are simply interested in self-protection and in some…

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Forms of Love

By Dr. Jordan / April 9, 2012 /

As a general definition of what we mean by the phrase ‘love-life,’ I’ll offer you the following: A love-life is what you think, feel, and do in your life involving the emotion of love including romance, family, how you feel about yourself, and beyond. This definition of love-life is probably a bit broader than you…

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Cure For The American Marriage

By Dr. Jordan / April 6, 2012 /

Apart from the usual factors that predict divorce like being too young, going against the family of origin, and breaking locally accepted conventions or customs that define a successful marriage. The most powerful influence on the success or failure of marriage will come from your own expectations. By expectations I simply mean, what you expect…

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I Love You vs I’m ‘In’ Love With You

By Dr. Jordan / April 6, 2012 /

Have you ever heard someone say “I love you but I’m not in love with you?” What’s the difference? It’s all in the little word ‘in.’ When you add the word ‘in’ to I love you, you’re making reference to the ‘fall.’ You fell into something with someone, in this case you fell into ‘love’…

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Know This Before Starting Couples Therapy

By Dr. Jordan / April 5, 2012 /

If you’re going through some kind of emotional trouble with a spouse or lover and the the possibility of couples or marital therapy comes up, you’ll need to know a few things about treating your love relationship before you start the treatment. First and foremost, you should come out of your first couples (or marital)…

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True Self in True Love

By Dr. Jordan / March 19, 2012 /

Otto Rank (1884-1939), an early psychoanalyst, made this wonderful statement about the experience of love……”Man’s true self, that which differs from character, expresses itself only in one sphere: namely the love life. There it is manifested quite spontaneously and in real love is just as spontaneously accepted and reciprocated.”  What an amazing idea to contemplate.…

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Fight, Flight, or Fall?

By Dr. Jordan / March 19, 2012 /

Most people will tell you there’s a lot of fighting and flight going on in our love-lives. Have we gotten to the point of thinking all of this is normal yet? Is it really a necessary drama that goes on when people try to make a go of it? Well I’d like to offer you…

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Help for Unwed Single Mothers

By Dr. Jordan / February 29, 2012 /

The February 18th New York Times front page ran a very disturbing article entitled, “Unwed Mothers Now A Majority Before Age Of 30.” The article went on to describe the fact that now more than half of births to American woman under 30 occur outside of marriage. I couldn’t believe my eyes, “more than half.”…

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